Jesus is the Anti-Zombie and The Zombie Commandments

By Brendan Scott

Have you ever had the fear that the living dead will come breaking through your door?  I’m talking about rotten decaying humans that hunger for your brains.

Many ancient societies held to the fear that the dead would come back to life and run rampant across the land.  Why else do we still bolt our coffins shut from the inside or why did the ancient Irish place a stone in the mouths of the dead.  Both are precautions against the dead returning to life; one locks the dead in a coffin and the other fills the mouth so that the dead is prevented from eating.

There are many other examples that prove that our world lives in fear of the death and  the dead.  Like the rules of cleanliness in ancient Israel, if a person touched a dead body there were considered unclean.  Maybe they were trying to prevent the spread of diseases or maybe they thought if someone interacted with the dead they would become a Zombie.

The technical definition of a Zombie is any dead body given the semblance of life, but mute and will-less by a supernatural force, usually for some evil purpose like eating brains.  In Harry Potter they are called Inferi and are used by dark wizards to attack the living. Even magical people fear the living dead.  Any Zombie has no will of his or her own, save to consume brains and make more Zombies.

Real Zombies, whether you believe in them or not, exist to suck life and meaning from their prey.  Zombies live, well not really live, with an unquenchable desire to feed.  Much like the American consumer, Zombies are always wanting more and what they leave in their path is death and destruction.

A Zombie’s main desire (If a Zombie has the free will to have his or her own desire) is to turn normal people into Zombies and once you have been turned into a Zombie you are condemned to a living death.  Imagine working in Dilbert’s cubicle for the rest of your life, bent on just amassing more; a “life” doomed to utter meaningless.  Just imagine living your life and your only desire is to eat brains;  human brains at that.

Fortunately Jesus Christ is the Anti-Zombie!  Jesus, who called himself, “The Good Shepherd,” who was willing to die for his, “sheep,”  knew he had to die so that we would be protected from a meaningless life.  In the Gospel of John Jesus says, “I have come that [you] may have life and have it to the full.”  Jesus did not come so that we would live our lives in mediocrity.  No he came to break us away from meaninglessness.  His life gave us a purpose, which I believe is to love and serve one another with a confidence that we are protected from the sting of death.

Jesus died so that “whoever believes in him shall not parish, but have eternal life.”  Anyone can die, but Jesus came back to life.  However, unlike Zombies who are the reanimated dead bent on destruction.  Jesus’ resurrection is, in essence, an act against a meaningless life.

As J.K. Rowling says in Harry Potter and The Deathly Hollows, “The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death.”  Rowling cleverly pulls this quote from 1st Corinthians chapter 15 verse 26.  She is making the point that death, and in my opinion, meaninglessness are enemies to be destroyed.  And fortunately for all of us Jesus has conquered these enemies.

Paul, the author of 1st Corinthians, believed that Christ’s resurrection was a resurrection to a spiritual life and that death has no sting or power.  That whoever allows Christ to work in their life will be changed in life and through death.  Their body might die, but their soul will live on in Heaven.

So Jesus’s death and resurrection give a meaning to life.  Where Zombies are reanimated to consume, Jesus died and came back to give us the freedom to live.  That is part of the practice of the Communion at church.  Believers take in Jesus’s body and blood and are given a full life; one that is satisfied by Jesus and not material goods.  We, normal humans, who don’t go around eating brains, no longer need to be afraid of Zombies, of meaninglessness, or death, because Jesus died and came back to life for us, so that we could live our lives to the full.

And now the Zombie Commandments: Some of Jesus’ commandments with a Zombie flavoring.

1. The most important commandment is this, “Love the lord your God with all your heart  and with all your soul and all your brain,” mmmmm brains I can’t get enough brains . . . I mean, “mind and with all your strength.

2. Love your neighbor as yourself because his brain tastes as good as yours.

3. You are the salt of the earth, so add extra humans on any brains you might eat.

4. You have heard it said, “Do not commit adultery.”  But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully and does not eat  her brain has already lost out on a chance for a good meal.

5. You have heard it said, “an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth,” but I tell you do not resist anyone that wants to eat your brain.

6. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your brain as well.

7. Give to anyone your brain if they ask for it, and do not turn away anyone who utters the phrase, “Must Eat Brain!”

8. You have heard it said, “Love your neighbor and hate your enemy,” but I tell you to love your enemy and pray for those who try to eat your brains.

9. Thou Shalt covet they neighbors brain.

10. Be a perfect brain eater as your Zombie father is a perfect brain eater.

Happy Halloween!!

Brendan dressed up as The Fantastic Mr. Fox for Halloween so he doesn’t want any candy for Halloween, just your chickens.

Harry Potter and the Kingdom of God

By Eugene C. Scott

Poor Harry. His parents were mysteriously murdered; now he lives in a nondescript time and place in England with the Dursleys, his dreary, selfish, muggle (non-magic) aunt and uncle and piggish cousin; he is confined–most of the time–to his bedroom, the closet under the stairs; and he doesn’t know who he really is, that he can do magic or that he is the most anticipated, celebrated wizard in all of wizarding history. Such is Harry Potter’s small life and world. In literary terms this is the setting, the mileu where certain things can and cannot happen, for Harry’s story.

Worse Harry has no notion such a wonderful place as Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, such a powerful, compassionate man as Albus Dumbledore even exist. Harry’s never played Quidditch; never flown on a broom and never met Hermione or Ron. He has no idea who he is.

But then Harry boards a train bound for Hogwarts and his world expands, both his problems and potential deepen.

Poor us. Though the settings for our stories may be less novel and romantic, more realistic than Harry’s, they are often no less tragic. We live in a mysteriously broken world within the confines of our own broom closets. Our jobs appear dreary; our marriages, families, and friendships imperfect. Just like Harry cannot practice magic much less grow into who he was born to be living at Number 4, Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey, UK, we seem unable to grow into who we were born to be in our earth-bound addresses. We too seem to not realize who we really are–the delight of God’s heart, created in his image–or that a wonderful place called heaven on earth or that a powerful, compassionate God even exist. This we believe to be the setting for our stories.

This dusty enslaving setting is just the one Jesus first strode into.  Bruce Cockburn wrote a song about what that day could have been like.

“The only sign you gave of who you were

When you first came walking down the road,

Was the way the dust motes danced around

Your feet in a cloud of gold

But everything you see’s not the way it seems —

Tears can sing and joy shed tears.

You can take the wisdom of this world

And give it to the ones who think it all ends here.”

“Change your lives. The kingdom of God is here,” Jesus said.

It’s as if he said, Get aboard the Hogwarts Express. There is more to this world than you can see or know. I am here to show you you are loved beyond your wildest imaginations.

You can live by faith not fear.

Live as if heaven is here and now, not just a place to go after you die.

Wholeness and healing too can begin here.

Forgiveness, purpose, truth, and life are in My hand. Take them. Live them.

In My world–My kingdom–your problems and pain will serve a purpose–My transformation of this drear world.  Your potential is as deep and wide and long as My love.

Cockburn calls this kind of life “Dancing in the Dragon’s Jaws.”

Yet we sit in our room beneath the stairs and wish.

The thing we love about Harry Potter is he is immature, unsure of himself, a boy of little faith, so to speak. Again, like us. This does not stop him, however, from reaching out and recklessly grasping for the richer life that is offered him. No matter how impossible it seems. It need not stop us either.

The difference is that what Jesus offers is not magic or a sweet piece of fiction. It is the way the truth and the life. The setting for our stories is more, better than we think. It is a vivid life lived with God beginning here and now.

“Change your lives. The kingdom of God is here.”

Very Superstitious: Christians and Baseball Players

Baseball players are infamous for their superstitious behavior. Watch almost any major league pitcher or batter. Before they pitch or hit, they repeat the exact same movements, adjusting their ball caps, fastening their gloves, pulling their shirts, spitting.

For example, relief pitcher Turk Wendell chewed and spit out four pieces of black licorice every inning he pitched. Slugger Barry Bonds kissed his gold necklace after he hit a home run. Worst of all was Kevin Rhomberg, who made little impact on baseball except for his obsessive need to touch back any one who touched him first. If he was tagged out on base, he would wait for the end of the inning and touch the opposing player back as the player left the field. If Rhomberg failed to return touch someone, he would send them a letter saying, “This constitutes a touch.” “The Seattle Times”

Laugh if you will (you should), but most of us, especially those of us who believe in God, behave superstitiously. Even King David. Read on.

Eugene C. Scott joins Mike in writing A Daily Bible Conversation twice a week.

TODAY’S READING (click here to view today’s reading online)

1 Chronicles 12:19-14:17

Romans 1:1-17

Psalm 9:13-20

Proverbs 19:4-5

INSIGHTS AND EXPLANATIONS

1 Chronicles 12:19-14:17: This section is largely a rehash of previous readings and the author seems concerned with telling us how David consolidated his throne. We see two things. First, many of the fighting men from other tribes, who presumably served with Saul, joined David, giving him military might. Second, unlike Saul, David seeks God before making any military moves, giving him spiritual heft.

Romans 1:1-17: I believe Paul was one of the greatest intellects in human history. If not for his strict Judeo/Christian worldview, Paul would be ranked with great philosophers such as Plato, Aristotle, and Descartes. Consider that in his letter to Christians in the city of Rome, he articulates the philosophies of reasoning from the natural to the supernatural (nature to God in chapter 1), the psychological concept of humans carrying dual natures (Jekyll and Hyde, chapter 7), the thorny idea of predestination (chapters 8-9), a nascent equality of races (chapter 9-11), and a brief but profound philosophy of government (chapter 13). These ideas and his powerful, often poetic, and logical way of communicating them  have earned him a respect that even Christians often do not award him.

If you’ve found A Daily Bible Conversation helpful, share it with your friends. Forward your daily email or send them a link to the website: www.bibleconversation.com.

THE WORD MADE FRESH

Believers in God and baseball players are equally superstitious. By superstitious I mean that you, either consciously or subconsciously, believe that if you do or say certain things, that may not actually be connected, a specified outcome will result.

Outfielder Larry Walker fixated on the number three. He wore number 33 and was married November 3 at 3:33P.M. Some Christians avoid 666 and revere threes and sevens. Other Christians repetitively cross themselves, kneel, and touch religious objects in a certain way. Hall of Fame third basemen Wade Boggs tagged third, second, and first base in that order before each game. He would also walk on the baseline, step twice in the coach’s box, and take four steps to get into the dugout.

A stretch, you say. A truth spoken in jest, I say.

After Saul died, King David began to consolidate his throne by not only gathering his army and asking for God’s guidance–very wise moves–he also decided to retrieve the ark of God as a means of having something physically to show God was on his side.

How can I classify that as superstitious? First, David, by not investigating how God commanded the ark be moved, shows he was not really concerned with honoring God, but rather with gaining control of God through obtaining this religious relic. Witness how David transports the ark the same way the Philistines did when they superstitiously returned it.

Second, God takes the life of Uzzah, when he touches the ark. When God takes such drastic measures to make his point, the point is always a major one. God is not perturbed with Uzzah for touching the ark, but rather with David’s view and expectations of the ark.

Just like Wade Boggs, David is guilty of magical thinking.

We are too. We (subconsciously) believe if we go to church, or make a donation, or have enough people praying, or quote a Bible verse, or do God-stuff, God will be pleased with us, or heal us, or do what we have asked (demanded).

This is one of the fallacies inherent in the question, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” In part this is magical thinking, much like Kevin Rhomberg’s. If I do good things, God must touch me back with good things.

God wants us to know he loves us so much he freely interacts with us. But God is not magic. God is a self-determined, living Being. God cannot be contained in an ark, and therefore controlled by the owner of the ark. God hears our prayers–and often answers them. God smiles on our good deeds–and often rewards them. But these things do not compel God or control him.

Far better would it have been had David regained the ark out of his love and respect for God. Far better also is it for us to worship, pray, serve, and give out of love and respect for God rather than hoping those actions will garner God’s gifts.

1. Which reading spoke to you?
2. How have you exhibited superstitious behavior toward God?

If you’re reading this blog on Facebook and you’d like to join the conversation, click here. www.bibleconversation.com.

Eugene co-pastors The Neighborhood Church in Littleton, CO and writes a blog eugenesgodsightings.blogspot.com

Presto Chango!

When I re-introduced myself at my twenty year high school reunion, most of my classmates simply gaped. I was unrecognizable to them. Not just because I had grown older, but because I had become someone entirely different. One long-lost friend said, “Eugene, we voted you most likely to be dead.”

In a way he was right. I had died. All most of them could remember about me was that I was a good [sic] source for drugs and that I had flunked my sophomore year and had disappeared (dropped out) in the fall of my junior year. There are no pictures of me in the yearbooks, even my name was expunged for what would have been my junior and senior years.

I had died. At least that angst driven, drug addicted, confused, human IED I was back then had.

Robert McKee, in his book Story, writes that we humans don’t “take any risks we don’t have to, change if we don’t have to. Why should we? Why do anything the hard way if we can get what we want the easy way?”

How is it then that I had changed (again not gray hair, wrinkles, and a bit of a gut) so in twenty years? McKee was right. It was not easy and it came at the cost of two lives.

Eugene C. Scott joins Mike in writing A Daily Bible Conversation twice a week.

TODAY’S READING (click here to view today’s reading online)

2 Samuel 20:14-21:22

Acts 1:1-26

Psalm 121:1-8

Proverbs 16:18

INSIGHTS AND EXPLANATIONS

2 Samuel 20:14-21:22 David, with God’s help, solidifies his rule of Israel. But he is getting old and even his Psalm is more about looking back than reaching for what God has ahead. Even great men like David seem to forget to live in the present and hope in the future.

If you’ve found A Daily Bible Conversation helpful, share it with your friends. Forward your daily email or send them a link to the website: www.bibleconversation.com.

THE WORD MADE FRESH

Every story has a turning point. Robert McKee calls it the “negation of the negation.” This is the point in a story where the worst that could possibly happen does–and then gets worse. Nothing changes, truly changes, in our stories until this point.

For Jesus’ friends nothing could get worse than Jesus’ awful death. They are grief stricken, deflated, finished. Every dream, hope, and plan for their world to get better was nailed to the cross and drained of life.

But wait! Jesus conquers death, is resurrected! Now he’ll show those Romans and those unbelieving religious people. Now Jesus’ll set things right. Jesus’ll get ‘em.

But instead of using his power to conquer evil, he wanders around for forty days eating fish and teaching and saying cryptic things such as, “You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea, and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.”

I can imagine the folks at the back of the crowd, confused looks on their faces, asking, “Who’s this Holy Spirit guy? We’re his witnesses? What does that mean?” Then Jesus floats off into heaven.

Things just got a whole lot worse. Jesus has disappeared in a cloud and left the entire revolution up to losers like Peter and Bartholomew and you and me. This is the plan, however, the true turning point. But they don’t know that. We know the end of the story, they don’t. This is it for them. Only now are they ready for change. And change they do.

In The Message, in his introduction to Acts, Eugene Peterson writes, “The story of Jesus doesn’t end with Jesus. It continues in the lives of those who believe in him. . . . [T]hey are in on the action of God, God acting in them, God living in them. Which also means, of course, in us.”

We only change if we have to. The easy way would have been for Jesus to bodily stick around. Jesus, it seems, never did anything the easy way.

I’m glad for that because I was dead at sixteen, out of earthly options. Then one of those “who believe in him,” two thousands years after the fact, showed me the One who had given his life for me. Then and only then was I changed!

1. Do you agree that we must be forced to change?
2. Do we have a different perspective on pain than does God?
3. Can you name a time of the negation of the negation in your life?

If you’re reading this blog on Facebook and you’d like to join the conversation, click here. www.bibleconversation.com.

Eugene co-pastors The Neighborhood Church in Littleton, CO and writes a blog eugenesgodsightings.blogspot.com